2 June 2008;5:36 pm
Y
I will quietly wait for you...
well... beginnin of june come new entry lo...
life has been v down for me... thanx to my frens... i got bk on my feet... but still exhausted... sigh... o well.. it sux being chased out of e hse, juz becuz u r e so called "chu qi tong"... argh... damn it... sux xia...
well... B2 ask me to check this movie out, which recently finally came out on crunchyroll... its call sky of love(jap movie).... well... i muz say its reali a damn nice movie.. thou e storyline n ending seriously is extremely sad... n guess wad.. i gt all emotional n started cryin... sheez... guess wasted loads of tissues... was extremely sad.. well.. it only goes to show one thing, treasure e ones u love... u nv noe when fate will come by??.. as well as noein tt life is fragile... treasure it...
*cough cough*
i guess tt doesn apply for me... haha... o well... i guess i thot it thru... its time for me to start givin up on smokin once again... i guess its gonna b one of e toughest thing for me to go thru tt once again, after i stop when i was 15? gosh.. still had e reasons bk then due to my age... now i don noe wads gonna b my reason... hahahahax.... but i guess.. its best for all e ppl ard me.. i wldn wan them to die faster than me becuz of 2nd hand la... bad... hmmm... mayb best for me to hide n lone e time off once again.... thou my body condition isn good at all... said i may lose my life if i torture it again....
well... if only i can hav e life like i had when i was young... my brother is bk nxt to me... playin bball like we do when we were kids... ka jiao-in my sis once in a while, when she is doin her homework n how she gt irritated... o.. how i miss my siblings bk then... but now, one is down with her own work, shouts at me for no reason.... e other one left with a gal.. livin somewhere in sg where i don even noe... now all bcuz of one drunkard.... n one dude tt left with a gal.. leavin e messy stall for me to clear up.. cuz mum n sis cant b bothered alr... i m left alone clearin up this deserted stall.... its so fustratin sometimes tt i wish i cld juz hide a place n cry...
I wondered to myself all e time...
"why m i doin this?"
"why shld i do this when it aint my prob?"
"why cant things juz go bk e way it use to be?"
"why love was given to my siblings when they don hav to do other shit, but i was given tt burden to carry with no love given?"
well... i guess i doubt myself too much tt its so hard to let things go... darkness is wad i had all e time... life is juz tough to hang on some times... man.. i juz wish i can cry all i wan... i juz cant express myself... argh... tt seriously sux... as i listenin to this song "heavenly days - Yui Aragaki"(sky of love jap movie OST).. thou i don understand e words currently... but somehow tears juz start fallin... well.. kinda weird feelin... i guess its best to cry out alone.. at least no one wun b able to see all ur sorrows n pain... cryin cryin cryin.... sigh....
k la.. done for this entry....
out~~
