After gettin pissed and punches, i decided 2 cool down and get over and done with the yr... man... 2day had 2 help with the fun fair... i wonder if i did anythin wrong as it seems that nicole is a bit cold 2wards me... i wonder wad has happen 2 her... hope she is ok... well... i wish i could go somewhere and breathe... apparently my current hairstyle had a little prob, notice some sec 1 & 2s cut their hair almost the length of mine... sharks.. its all my fault.. haiz... well... hav 2 go now... 2molo got fun fair and sis is comin... yippee.... cant wait... hee...sIgNiNg OfF

Today my mood is like this pic... hate and anger.. but its like look back at the yrs in smss is quite a long time... but its like i has been in there almost half my life liao... i don know... its like i m quite unhappy with myself for producin such bad marks... i feel i hav failed badly causin 2 get a punch from someone that i see everyday of my life besides scoldin... haiz... gettin my face in a state of pain and hate at the same time.. its like as though, u rather live in somewhere cold and nv b found and can never b found till the day of death... mayb the stream i will b in nxt yr will somehow cause more further distance away from my frens that i hang out with in the last 3 yrs and somehow its kinda lost and i m afraid i can never make it there instead... i don dare 2 approach help frm ppl who teaches in class... even i myself don why, mayb i don how 2 ask or how 2 even start a conv with them, that kind of thinkin hav been in my mind since pri sch, whenever i hav prob, i wanna approach them, but i juz somehow lost my guts, somehow i kept askin myself if i m doin the rite thing, afraid 2 cause trouble and more load 2 them.. i know they are 4eva there 2 help, but i juz cant get myself 2 ask.. i don wad has happen 2 me... i reali don know... i feel rather lost now... anywae... lookin forward 2 the sports camp, hope can communicate better with the juniors.. well thats all.... sIgNiNg OfF..

W-inds

Sorrie... took me long time 2 blog.. anywae... 2day didn go sch... xian... even though sick, had 2 do hse work, like mop floor, iron my clothes(duh), then pack my stuff 4 the next day thingy... then anywae... heard like nothin happen in sch, but its like my results are so bad 2 be true... i donno what holds 4 me and wad is cookin up 2ward me... i donno lah... but i hope i m given the one last chance 2 finish my last yr and not 2 drag on anymore... and mostly i feel is that, i confused with the stuff i know which causes this 2 happen, and also i think its that, when teachers ask me things, i will try hard 2 ans, when i study, i don know wad part i understand or not and how 2 ask or 2 approach a teacher... thats all i can reflect... i guess there is still no confidence in myself... think its gettin late.. i shld b goin... anywae... my pic of the day is one of my fave jap band, W-inds... Enjoy... sIgNiNg OfF...

2day is the death day 4 me... its like all the papers are back... and the marks are like "man jiang hong" haiz... i m givin up hope liao... i donno wad i wanna do now and in the future.... mayb i don even hav one... i don know.... its so hard and i hav 2 see her again... i hate seeing her... pain in the neck... i think i m givin up soon... and hopeless person, wad hav i done... i hav 2 reflect....



but besides that, i cant wait 4 the uni netball match 2 come... haha... and also hav trainin... so fun... haha... as well as bball trainin,( juz got news that coach selection 4 15 player and i think in m one of them, apparently some juniors are unhappy... i don know lah.. thats all i heard... one think i hate abt this is that, if u are not happy with me, i rather u tell me the truth than 2 talk things behind my back... it suxs 2 the core... thanx a lot...) and next yr's match.... yippee..... Luv it manz... anywae... comin back 2 my studies which is in a red bath now.. haiz... "xin leng qu".... yippee.. goin out 2molo 2 watch the grudge after trainin... sheez... hope i don sleep while watchin it... haha... and 2day is a rush and long day esp with my stomach crampin every like 2 hrs and i almost wanna die of "pain".. haha... well.. think that all i got 2 say... see ya... sIgNiNg OfF

So sorrie... didn blog yesterday... apparently my sis was quite pissed that i use the com 2 frequently... wad 2 do? anywae... yesterday, went 4 blood test.. when the nurse took out the needle, i saw it, i almost faint... its was quite thick.. then she was quite pissed with the previous patient, so she was so pissed that she forgot 2 numb my rite elbow... then i stared at her.. then at my elbow, then she sort of got my hint, then she pai sehly, go and take that numbin thingy... then after apply that, that fat needle juz went into my elbow... then i was so amused with the amt of blood that i hav.... hee... :x... lame rite.. haha... anywae... after that, i went out 2 zf hse... cuz wanted 2 play bball mah... then in the end didn play, cuz rain, then hang around at her hse, then her youngest bro kept playin with me... so damn playful, then had 2 carry him.... haha... after playin 4 damn long time... i was kinda xian... then watch the anime meteor garden with zf.... then her bro fell asleep in the room... so cute... haha... then zf and i watch and watch till 6 plus, then went off 2 the food court 2 eat ice-kachang... haha... so coolin.. whole mouth was iceing.....

As 4 2day.. i felt so a sinner.... i did so badly 4 all my subs... i think i m gonna retain... suprisingly those sub that i did well are the ones that i didn reali study at all... then those i studied, did damn badly.... how am i gonna survive... worst... suppose 2 go trainin... then rainin, wanted 2 tell mum 2 ask dad 2 pick me up after trainin, then she gav the wrong info 2 dad... then he came b4 the coach came... then i was like how how?? then my dad juz told the coach that he bringing me back... as he know the coach mah.... but, i find it damn unfair lor... its like ppl train so hard 2 get in2 sch team, i like that, its so unfair lor... muz train myself instead... haiz.... how shit can i b 2day... but the good thing is that my hair wasn that bad... everyone kinda like it... appparently its short, but it didn look that guyly on me... haha... well well well... i think i stop here b4 my sis nag again... haiz... buaiz... blog some time later ba.... sIgNiNg OfF

WOW.... today was one of the most coolest day of my life... 2day went 4 trainin, the whole senior team came... so happy, at least i m not alone... after warm-up, had 2 run for 10 minutes, half way kanna stiches.. grr... then had a hard time walkin back 2 court, cuz was so painful... anywae, rest a bit, then did swoop hand dribble and went 2 do lay-ups, didn miss any of them... so happy.. haha.. then the horror came, hav 2 run 4zhe... wah... damn tired, then coach talk 2 us abt how the way we shld play and stuff... then we went 2 play Seniors Vs Juniors lah... we all seniors, esp me, had not been trainin since after the b'div tournament of course will tired... i hav 2 reali salute 2 Julie... she damn power pack man, she can run and run, her stamina is better than the whole senior team, damn cool lor... haha... anywae, half way in the game, the coach join in also,then zf came... then after that drizzle a bit, then the rest of them went in2 the shelter, while zf and i continued playin lor, then i realise how bad and bloodly lousy i was... haiz... sob sob sob.. anywae...went corra with the whole senior team and zf, then went 2 this cool westen food shop, so cool, the food there was great lah, then the rest of them left and three person left, so we went 2 the hair dresser shop 2 cut hair 4 e 2nd time, i told e lady that i wanna, cut my hair, not too short and thinner, in the end.... this time 2 my horror, the lady cut the hair 2 short and now i look like guy, donno whether i will die on wed.. haiz.. RESULTS are comin out, and i m dyin, if only markin days were longer... haha... anywae... after that, one of them left, then zf and i went 2 nicole's hse, Omg, its one of the funniest times, as zf and nicole hav nv seen each other b4, after that zf and i stink her whole room, so we went 2 take shower, so i went in first... and her showerin thingy looks like a stick and i was like wad?? like that ah... haha.. so juz use it lor, at last, i smell damn good liao, then came out.. haha... then was zf's turn, nicole and i cldn stop laughin, u know why??? cuz she bought a very small towel, then i was like this part is 4 e head, this part 4 the body, that 4 e legs... etc... then she was like wantin 2 kill me liao lah... haha.. then after she came out, i return nicole her comics lah, then nicole and i showed zf, nicole's collection of comics lah, she was quite shock, then we took quite a lot out 2 read... instead of readin, we were gigglin and laugh at the nonsense indian song i was singin... in chinese words, "yuan de bu neng na, fang de ke yi na..." then we were laughin like mad, then i told nicole abt wad my coach say abt zf, cuz supriseingly he knows her lah... b4 i could tell nicole, zf kept hittin and pullin my leg lah, then nicole wanted 2 know, cuz b4 i wanted 2 say, i was laughin like mad... haha, then nicole pulled my arm.. then they were like sort of torturin me lah.. haha.. anywae... he said that the 1st time he played with zf, he thot she was a guy lah, then when he played with her, she contacts him a lot, that reali gave him a huge impression that she was a guy lah, by the way she play and stuff lah... then once she defend him mah, then he was kinda pissed, then he grab the ball and wanted 2 turn around, he accidiently hit her chest lah, then as a gal... of course will hurt mah... guy mayb diff strory lah... then his fren told him tha zf was a gal lah.. then he pai seh 2 the max... wah lau.. everyone(the whole bball team lah) was laughin like mad.. then when i told nicole that, we were all laughin and we see a tomato zf.. damn farnie... haha... she was laughin too... so fun, later, we went down 2 the hall 2 watch tv, then we didn on anythin at first, cuz we were laughin at zf, cuz she was scared of dogs mah, then gd thing nicole's hse hav a cute doggie..."jewel".. haha.. then she was freakin out, so she went 2 the top of the sofa and lean there and was so sacred, and she even "MARK HER TERITORY" with the pilliows on the sofa... haha... cldn stop laughin again... then nicole's grandma was so nice 2 turn on the fan and air-con 4 us... haha.. then the only thing that was not on was the Tv... so i hinted, nicole lah.. i said.. :"nicole, we are seein somethin on the tv..." then she wanted 2 go and on the tv... while she wanted 2 stand up... i ans lah:"we see a blackscreen of a tv.... " then she sat back down and laugh... hahaha.... so gao xiao... while flickin channels, i ask her if there is any nice movies... so she went 2 take a korean horror movie, then it was call donno wad name lah.. its abt this pair of happy couple adopted a boy frm and ophan home lah... as they thought they cannot hav a kid of their own after tryin 4 a long time... but the strange thing abt this boy is that he like 2 look at trees and bugs and love 2 draw them, then he always kept one bug in his hand where and whenever he goes lah, there was a tree in the couple's garden and the boy hang out with the tree everytime.. then one day, the couple's mother-in-law came and pass a fan 2 the wife(claim that the fan will help her 2 get pregnant) as the mother-in-law doesn like the boy that they adopted, she disliked him and say nasty things in front of him and the wife, and the boy was quite crossed so he went 2 his room, whereby his mum had knitted half-way, woolen clother for him, he pulled the string out and fast, and when the wife sees it, she was quite worried... so one day, the wife was pregnant with her own child, so the boy was kinda neglected lah...while lookin at the tree, a gal frm next door came and they become best play-mates.... after awhile after the child was born, the boy was even more alone, he attempt 2 burn the fan, the wife found out when she smell 1 of the rms in the hse of burnin lah.. then she sort of dislike him even more, the boy even tried 2 kill its own half-sibling, and was stopped by the wife which causes the relationship of the mother and child 2 break further and further... but the husband who was a doctor, love both children equally, but the boy was still not satisfied... so one day, the mother-in-law called 2 tell the wife 2 send the boy back 2 the ophan home... the wife did hav a bit of intension of bring him back, but she tried not b selfish, sadly the boy heard everythin and he ran away 2 the tree... 2 the wife thot that it was the tree in the back of their garden had some some sprits possesing... when the wife wanted 2 chop the tree down, the boy stopped him and claims that the tree is actually his late mother who passed away and has become the sprit of the tree... durin the struggle, the wife accidiently axe part of the boy's face and he died, in shocked she couldn do anythin, then the husband came back and saw the blood bath in the garden, so he had no choice but 2 burry the boy, actually the boy was sort of breathin, cldn take the fact, the husband became mad, and he smash the spade rite at the boy's hand and head 2 knock him out and burry him some distance away... and the boy's play-mate saw everythin, but didn say anythin, and the couple made up a story that the boy was missin, as the day went by, the trees that was burried near the boy grew flowers, its was actually said that the flower had not bloom any flowers since more than a year ago.... and it was actually bloomin flower, as the mother- in-law was pushin the cart with the child in it, she saw a flower drop off the tree 2 the ground, the mother-in-law went 2 smell it and suddenly she puked blood and died instantly.... and in the later part where the husband threaten 2 kill the wife, the wife took a sharp object and killed her husband,then she went 2 the tree and started stabbin it, the boy's play-mate appeared and say that the wife is actuall hurtin the boy as after his death, his sprit was together with the tree, goin insane, the wife killed herself... after all the death, some worker dug out the boy's dead body, they found out that the roots of the tree had reach and combine together with his body and he was all still in flesh and bloody... yea... so after watchin that, it seems damn sad and spooky... yea... anywae... after that, we were watchin this channel where it shows all the yummy japanese food, nicole and i were droolin like mad... haha.. then went 2 watchin and watchin kenshin then happy fish and we left, then i was still yackin abt my bloody shor hair.... then took bus and a train ride home... and gobble my whole dinner... haha... and now here i m... haha... well thats all... blogin soon.... sIgNiNg OfF

Howdy... haha... went out cut my hair, haha... ppl say it look like as though nothin change.. haha.. so odd... haiz.. anywae... 2day , the whole family went out for breakfast come lunch, cuz tues is mum's 44th birthday....they wanted 2 celebrate it earlier as my bro is return 2 camp tonite at 10.. and cant come out 4 the week... haiz.. well.. 2day, had the "longest" sleep record man... 2 hrs only... cuz rest of the time went watchin mid-nite movie and cheongin out in orchard in the middle of the nite... haha.. so cool rite.... i was suppose 2 b slpin, but end up with my sis and her frenz in orchard, strollin and doin dumb and stupid stuff in orchard, like walkin the middle of the road in orchard, one of my sis' frens almost go "lang ga" by a sport car... wah lau... "ga u man..." haha... y cuz he was kissin his galfriend and drivin at the same time.. wad lousy driver is that... cant they do that at home or somewhere else or time, cuz it was so at the wrong time, and i think both of them were a bit boastful ba... but wad the heck...everyone safe can liao.... anywae... 2molo got trainin.. wee... need 2 endure and endure as trainin is harder, its not as bad as the netball training that I had in pri sch.... but gettin old and too fat 2 run, thats bad... sheez....wanted 2 go swimmin one ... but haiz... barboon cldn wake up in time... haiz... now here is a horror... my bro is eatin now... and he keeps fartin and fartin, it kinda reminds me of a person... haha... ppl who wanna guess can go on guess... (hint: she also love 2 fart, mayb thats her hobby??? :x).. haha... anywae... after meal today, mum and sis went shoppin in "cow car water" then 4 the 1st time, we tried "gui ling gao", sort of like herbal jelly i think, 3 of us shared one bowl of that, apparently it taste damn bitter, and barboon find it so bitter that she added loads of sugar syrup 2 get the bitter taste away, then my mum ate a small bowl, and the more than half the big bowl of "gui ling gao" was finsih up by me... and it was so smooth in texture yet so bitter... yuke... i thought it wld b sweet, "suo wei: Ku Kou Liang Yao"... but its still yucky... but ate liao... so wad the hell, then went woodlands 2 cut hair, abt 10 bucks, but look no diff, then took train home, was quite packed as sardines, finally reach home, then barboon and mum was sayin that i look ok, then bozo say i look like didi... wad nonsense is that... well... i m gonna cut it again ba... see how... most prob after trainin 2molo... hee... anywae... i kinda enjoy the new trainin.. cool man... muz train harder, i admit i m lazy durin the last trainin, knee injury again... grr..... thats it all... blog again 2molo ba... nitez... sIgNiNg OfF......

Haiz haiz... its like centuries since i last blog well i change blog liao.. so wad the hell... my last paper is over!!!! haha... so happy... after work work work for like 3 weeks.. its more like 3 years... guess wad... so much things happen durin the paper... e.g. teacher hitting my table more than 5 times... even better.. donno how in the world, the teacher walk, then she trip her other leg and went crashin in2 me... well well well... and best, landed with a injured left wrist... and 2 teachers panic... haha... it was so funny... then they sort of fought, who do this and do that... and in the end i managed 2 finish my paper on time with no extension.... so happy that bball training is back, a lot of things may hav change... but hey... i don mind... even though i know ppl who don like me... but i hav to live with it anywae.... it may b quite hard... and when i saw the notice on the bball board, i was kinda shocked... wriiten there... "bball training resume on friday, 15/10... @3 pm, next week, selection 4 next year's sch team, not selected, find yourself another CCA..." i was like erm.. thats kinda odd... hmmm... but i don wanna say much.... and after reading mich's blog, i cldn stop laughin, apparently her history outin was quite farnie... but anywae... on that day when she had her history outing, i was p.s, quite nearby where she was lah... but she didn tell me anythin... but after readin her blog, it was so damn farnie... if only next time when she go out again, then i go see wads happen "live" and laugh till i drop.. hee.... :x.. ah well... i m quite scared for the selection actually.... wad if i don make it... wad if this and wad if that... these are most of the things that goin through my head now... i m very scared and worried.... abt the selection as well as promotion 2 sec4 next yr... wad if i don make it, wad will happen... will things turn out the way i want it 2 b...well had training after the paper.. long time didn train.. so might be good 2 build my physical and mental strength up...well, the new coach turn out my dad's fren, i was quite stunned, cuz i heard it was suppose 2 be a female... this coach is good, his trainin style was quite fun.. kinda enjoy it.. hope the others do... i donno... i juz hope ppl out there will forgive in wadeva ways i hav cause direct or indirect harm, and be frens, senior, junior again... well that all i gotta say...... sIgNiNg OfF